Purpose in the moment

Yesterday, I had a day that started off pretty good but somewhere along the middle, started going downhill. I feel like I am on this roller coaster of ups and downs when it comes to what God is calling me to do. The boys and I started off the day with play at home, then the library, and then we were off to Chic Fil A to meet with their Uncle. This all went well, except for the minor incident of Tucker choking on ice. Who ever thought you could choke on ice and it would hurt. After 2 almost gags and lots of screaming a shrill painful scream, my brother was finally able to get him calmed down and the ice melted. SCARY!!!!

Somewhere after this is seems like my day started going down the roller coaster. I am trying to get my house organized for the fall and am rearranging things. I was hoping the boys would rest or nap but no such luck so they turned into tired cranky, screaming monsters from about 3 to 5 in the afternoon. This did not help my mood. Then daddy came home and they were once again angels. Huh, funny how that happens!!!

Anyways, back to my purpose somewhere along the way of my day, I started questioning what I felt I had figured out was my purpose with summer camp at our church. I feel like since the camp is over (it was awesome by the way) I have been questioning what God has me doing. I finally feel like I have figured it out and I am clear and then I am attacked by doubt and fear and I start sliding down the hill again. I question, Am I suited for the job? Do I have what it takes to handle what comes at me? Why is God calling me? Is it Him really calling me? Can I do camp and still spend as much time with my kids as He wants me too? I know the answers to these but I still have to remind myself of them. So, for all my friends and family that read this, I am asking for prayer to hear and listen to God's calling and to be strong enough to follow through. I also ask for the spirit of doubt in myself to be lifted. I am not capable by myself to do these thing but through God I am, or He would not call me to do it. My day is starting off better today. I am determined to TRUST AND BELIEVE. I am SHOUTING at doubt every time it creeps in because it is one thing that I feel keeps so many of us from following what God has called us to do in both the big and the small things in our life. Doubt keeps us from developing friendships, from sharing the greatest MESSAGE ever, from opening up to others and developing the Christ-like relationships God wanted, and so many other things. So if you see me walking around shouting at myself, you will know why:) OK, maybe not literally but wouldn't it be fun.

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